Four simple words with so much meaning. My good friend Michael Walker used to say these words at the end of every conversation we would have via phone, and they were plentiful. I can still hear his voice in my head perfectly after two years. The voice that I can't hear, and I don't know why, is that of my grandfather. My grandfather passed away on this date in 1991. I was only ten years old when this happened, but I recall the memory well. My family and I were watching Nick at Nite (back when that network aired shows other than Home Improvement and Roseanne for their "classic television" line-up) and the entire screen was green in honor of St. Patrick's Day. We got a phone call that would cut that fun family night short and change our lives forever. My grandfather was an amazing man with so many quirks and interesting personality traits. I remember having him sit back in his easy chair and pretend that he was getting his hair washed while we watched The Price is Right. He was always such a good sport about it, even with his 3 tufts of hair...
Why I remember Michael's voice and not not my grandfather's has a lot to do with the amount of time that they have been gone. Michael has been gone two years, whereas my grandfather has been gone for 20. Wait..is that right? 20 years? I have been without this person for more time than I was with him and yet the memories are still so vivid. I have been told that I have a ridiculously vivid memory to begin with, but I think that there is more to it than that. What I'm trying to say is that today is a day that I remember my grandfather. I'm not the most sentimental person, but after having a child that has *cough cough* slightly changed in some subtle ways. I think about the importance of anniversaries, birthdays and other monumental events with more of an urgency to remember and celebrate them than I have in the past. I suppose I'm no longer the one choking back tears at sad movies, avoiding funerals in order to not show public displays of emotion or skipping over days like today to eliminate any unpleasant thoughts that might enter my head. The fact is, in order to truly embrace the life that you have today, it is important to honor your past. Robert Nash Bigelow is the kind of person that I was, and still am, proud to call my Papa and even more honored to name my child after. Besides, if Miles ever goes into the music business he can drop the Hutchinson and simply be Miles Nash. Now what about that name doesn't scream touring musician?
While many may be slugging down their green beers today in honor of this Irish holiday we call St. Patrick's Day, I think I may skip that acid reflux battle that alcohol inevitably causes, and spend my time looking at old pictures. I know I have some of papa sitting in his favorite chair, pocket protector securely in place, waiting for his "favorite" grandchild to come and join him for next episode of Wheel of Fortune. That man loved his game shows.....
Happy St. Patrick's Day to you all.
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